It's hard out here for a golf hustla

Carmel

I can tell you I didn't think I'd be calling Vegas home about three years ago when I was back in Sweden, but I guess it is now. On the way back from San Francisco we decided to take the Pacific Coast Highway because they said it's very nice visually and I hadn't seen it so we drove down it. We drove about three and a half hours south past Santa Cruz and San Jose and whatever else is down there. That's when we realized we had to make a stop up in northern Nevada anyway, and going all the way down to L.A. then to Vegas then up to northern Nevada. That would've actually been a longer trip by several hours than turning around, so being the smart planners we are, we turned right the fuck around and headed back to San Francisco. I took a little nap somewhere around here but I think we drove back through Sacramento. If memory recalls, the next stop we made was in Carmel. That place is also host to Pebble Beach golf course and a bunch of other just absolutely awesome places, we were going to go play a round of golf at Pebble Beach but since they would charge us about $60,000, our rental car, our right leg and give up your kid so we decided it was a little too expensive for us. We were fine with the car, the money and the leg but Jamie just didn't want to give up little Jayci West because it's his little pumpkinhead and he wouldn't give her up. I tried convincing him that Pebble Beach is an awesome course and there's always new kids to adopt but he wouldn't budge. Bummer. We drove around and took some pictures of the place, and then left for Tahoe.

Pacific Coast Highway stop

We made it to Tahoe at around midnight, decided we can't go any further since we'd been driving about 14 hours so we just got a hotel there and went right to sleep.

Our room at Tahoe

The following day we got up fairly early and we went to check out the casinos around there but they had nothing in terms of poker so we just decided to go play golf. Now this is where it started getting interesting.

So being the true gamblers that we are, we decided we're going to make some bets. The deal was $10 per person, per hole to the winner of the hole. It was a 9 hole course so a sweep would net you $90+90 - $180, plus a small $20 bonus to whoever won the total score. No one had an idea how anybody else played but we figured it'd be fun. Jamie was pulling some practice swings and it looked pretty good and he said his grandfather owns a golfshop and he started taking lessons when he was four or something. Is it too late to reneg the bet was what went through my mind, but alas, it was. We teed off on the first one and I think all of us sucked. My swing was horrible, they had no driving range to practice on so I was plenty rusty, not that I ever really could play. I've gone maybe three rounds in my life together with my brother and never shot anything worth bragging about so I knew I'd suck. The first three holes all went to shit for me, Shawn was surprising though. He had a tendency to shoot balls that went about one foot in the air slicking the ground but going far and perfectly straight. Mine and Jamies shots after a while went up in the air but after that they got their own fucking will and went right or left depending on their mood, very rarely were they in the mood to go perfectly straight. I also putt about as well as a blind man crippled with no arms so I had that working against me. If they just took the putting, chipping, pitching and basically anything that doesn't involve me hitting the ball with any type of touch or feel I'd be a superb fucking golfer. After the first nine and the dust settled, Shawn shot a 46, Jamie shot a 60 after being all over the place and I shot a 52. Shawn slaughtered us, he won about $80 total on it though as he didn't win all the holes and shit.

Jamie in action

The next round, we decided to up the ante since we all knew how we played. We somehow got Shawn to spot us half a stroke a hole counting ONLY towards the end total. Then we played for $40 a piece per hole, so $80 per hole. The total you could win now by sweeping was 9x8 = $560 plus an added $150 bonus, $75 per person for having the best total score at the end. I was now swinging much better too and felt confident as I had already counted Jamie out as he couldn't hit a ball straight to save his life in the first round and was just worried about Shawn but I figured he'd choke and I'd make some easy money.

First tee-off Jamie hits it like 230 yds perfectly straight onto the fairway. Wow... would you have thunk it? His swing changed, his stance changed and he actually hits them good now. Am I being hustled by my best fucking buddy? It cannot be, he wouldn't do shit like that. I still hit pretty good and birdied like the 4th hole and I was playing a ton better than the round before. My tee-shots and my chips and pitches were all going very well I just still couldn't putt. Shawn was playing solid still although the first five holes he was all over the place but the last four he played perfect. Jamie had the game of his life as all of a sudden he couldn't miss... WHAT A FUCKING COINCIDENCE since the stakes had been raised huh?

If it wasn't for the skin-color I know you'd think that's Tiger. Man, I look good.

It comes down to the very last hole and me and Jamie are dead even in amount of holes won, the very last hole is played as a carry-over from the last one though so $160 is riding on it plus the total score. I was two strokes ahead of Jamie and five ahead of Shawn for the very last hole. It was like 170 yards if mind serves me right and I tee'd off perfect hitting it straight and landed about 30 feet from the green. I figured I was good as gold now to win it. Jamie hit his absolutely perfectly landing maybe 50 feet away from the pin right on the fucking green, Shawn hits his as well and lands RIGHT NEXT TO JAMIE. I was like motherfucker the tee-shot of my life and I'm in third. I should've picked one club longer, damnit. We go over there and they're teasing me about choking and that I'll fuck this up and this and that. They didn't know that you could probably think I was half-russian and half-serbian considering how incredibly icy cool I am under pressure. I go to chip in with the calmness and confidence of a steroid-induced Barry Bonds when I chip it ALL THE WAY over the flag and onto the other side of the green. I heard them coughing something about "choke" when I was walking with my tail between my legs to the ball. I get it up on green and Jamie sinks his second putt for par and I have two putts to sink it for a win, three for a tie. I miss my first putt, I miss my second one and on the third putt it's literally like 15 inches and I nonchalantly walk up to tap it in and it swirls around the cup and I miss and Jamie starts yelling "YES!" and this is about the time I picked up my club and smashed it right in his fucking forehead. I actually never did but I wanted to for a split-second as I admitted defeat and tapped out at 1hr and 45 min in round 2, hole 9. We paid the man his money and left shrugging our shoulders wondering how in the fuck he stepped up his game so much for round two. Mental note, don't ever gamble for money with Jamie until you've played with him a few times no matter what it is, motherfucker would hustle his own grandmother!

Tahoe

Then we drove home and I was so tired in the car, it was like 6 in the morning when I manage to do 95 on a 70 highway and there's like no cars in sight for miles and miles ahead. Except one, infront of us... wow... we're getting closer, it's black. It has a lot of antennas. It also has sirens on top. Looks awfully familar, I can't quite place what it might be.... OH MY GOD IT'S A COP. He pulls to the side infront of us, Jamie says "He got you bud..." and as I pass him he turns on the lights and pulls me over. I'm a retard. He reduced it to 85mph past but he clocked me at 95mph from a thousand feet. He was a very cool guy and I showed him my swedish license and he asked me a bunch about how I liked it here and was really quite nice, gave me a $200 ticket and told me to be careful on the way back. That sucked.

I passed out forever then woke up today, played some online. Decided to try some more $10/20 NL online as I've been trying to put in more sessions there and I won about $2800. I then played a very small $200 tournament on Paradise called Laguna, it had like 30 people and top 4 got paid. I played ultra-loose, super aggressive more-so than my usual self and managed to win it for $2000. So all in all, I had a pretty good day, except they were being pains in my ass when I tried to re-rent my car with Alamo but in the end it worked out. I need to just buy a decent car, this renting at $550 a week isn't cutting it. If anyone knows of a decent car in the Vegas area, with air conditioning and just in decent shape let me know.