WSOP Mega Satellite

Another purely poker blog where I'll be talking about all the hands I played too. Me and Chris from Arkansas moved our stuff from the Siena Suites to Treasure Island hotel on the Strip. After we got through doing that we went down to the Rio. As I came down there I saw they had a $1060 Mega Satellite to the main event which starts tomorrow that was beginning at 8pm. I put up the cash and bought straight in as I've never wanted to play in a tournament this badly.

I got seated at table 7 seat 6 and got off to a real good start. We started with 3000 chips and the blinds were 25/25 and went up every 40 minutes, a pretty good structure. I raised A-Q off early to 75, took it down on the flop with a continuation bet. Then on the fourth hand of the tournament, I pick up Q-Q. I take 75 to raise and as I threw it out there I see in the corner of my eye the guy on my left being about to raise, he notices that I'm raising and puts down his chips and counts out 300 instead for a re-raise. I hated this spot, I felt he was really strong but I decided to take a flop anyway and see if I hit a queen and see what he does on the flop. I called 225 more and the flop was 9-5-3. I check, he bets 500 and once again he just looked so incredibly confident that I just took my two queens, held 'em face-up and threw them in the muck. He said "Wow, that is a really good fold... most people would've gone broke..." and showed me K-K. I lost some chips but felt really good about my game at least.

A little later, I call after a bunch of people limp with 8-8 on the button. Flop is Q-10-8 with two clubs. Small blind leads out for 100, big blind calls, it folds to me and I raise it to 300. Both the blinds call. I wasn't worried about the small blind who led out as I put him on a queen or potentially flopping two pair. I didn't like the other blind calling cold behind as he can have absolutely anything in this spot. A four of diamonds peels off on the turn they check to me and I bet 750. The small blind calls again, and the big blind goes into the tank and finally folds. River is a 9 putting a dangerous bord of Q-10-8-4-9. I didn't put him on Q-J and when he instantly checked to me I thought I was good. I decided to make a semi-daring valuebet of 1150 only leaving myself very few chips but I thought I might be able to get a call from two pair. In retrospect I should've bet even smaller, he folds what he claims was a queen with a clubdraw. The big blind says he had a double belly-buster with A-J.

It gave me a nice little boost and I felt real good about things. Next hand I play is Q-Q again, I raise to 75 and I get one caller, flop A-K-10 I bet 125 he folds. Then I call a raise on the button, after the cutoff raises to 75 and I take a flop with him with 7h-5h. The flop is 7-5-2 rainbow, gin. He bets 100, I raise to 300, he reraises to 750 and I give him 88 through J-J here pretty much. I decide to call and for one make sure the board doesn't pair but two, get more money out of him since I'm in position on him. The turn is a 3, he bets 1000, I move in and he thinks for a little bit and folds. Off to a great start.

The blinds go up to 25/50 on level two and I limp under the gun with Ac Kc since this one guy who is on the button has shown a tendency to punish limpers and I was looking to put in a big limp-reraise on him incase he raises again. To my dismay, like four others limp behind.

The flop is Ax Qc Jc and it was a very nice flop for me, even though with a limped pot and so many in K-10 and QJ and AJ are all possible hands. I decide to check, everybody checks. Turn is the 10c giving me what might be the first royal fucking flush I've had playing live. I check, everybody checks. River is some blank and I bet 250 into the 250ish pot and everybody folds. I really felt like this was my tournament, I'm getting hands left and right and playing good. I'm winning a seat and then $10 million in the main event, no doubt.

I limp in another multi-way pot with As 5s on the button. Flop 8s-2s-2x and big blind leads out for 250. They all fold, and I call. It's a paired board but I didn't think he'd lead with a deuce. Turn is a 5, he bets 500 and I have quite a few chips so I gamble and call. River is not a spade but it's an ace, he checks I bet 700 and he folds. The level goes up to 50/100 and we go on a break. The next hand I play is right after the break, four people limp in and there's 550 in the pot and I got A8 in the cutoff. I make it 600 straight and everybody folds and I pick up some dead money.

Then comes what might be the craziest turn-out of a hand I've ever played in my poker career. A guy who loves to limp, limps in under the gun. I'm UTG+3 and I've got A-A. I raise to 450, a tightish older man a couple seats to my left pushes in for 2700 and I call of course. He's got Q-Q. I'm in good shape.

Flop comes down A-Q-6... turn 4.. river is the case Q giving him quads to beat my set of aces. The whole table erupted and people started coming over from surrounding tables to watch the crazy hand. If I had won that, I would've had somewhere around 10000 chips but instead I'm down to 5600. It was rough. I was still in with a decent stack but that would've been very nice to get as we were about to enter ante level and when I've got a lot of chips when antes come out, I can accumulate some serious chips. I took the beat fairly well and I never said anything about it, was smiling and laughing when they were talking about what a sick hand it was but about three hands after it I could tell I was starting to get frustrated so I took a walk and missed some hands and went to try to calm down and relax and tell myself I still have chips. I missed about ten hands, came back and sat down to play my best poker.

Another multiway pot, I'm 5th in the pot with 7s-5s and I'm in position. Flop As 3s 6h giving me a gutshot with a flushdraw, they all check to me but it was a limped pot and I had just lost a big pot so I didn't wanna try get aggressive so I check too. Turn is a 3 everybody checks again, river is the 10s and it checks to an older man who hadn't been making too many moves. He bets 400 into the 650 pot and I think for a while and decide to call. He had KQs for the nut flush.

Blinds go up to 75/150 and I don't play a single hand, and I only play one hand in the 100/200 level. That's 80 minutes of straight folding. The hand I won came on the the worst played A-K I've ever seen in my life. Everybody folds to the button, he limps in... I check my option with 3-5 offsuit. Flop A-J-10.. check check, turn 4, check check, river 2... I bet 400 and he calls and I tell him I've got a wheel and he shows A-K. Wow. Donkey?

The 100/200 with antes pass as well and I'm still folding, not picking up an ace, a decent king or even a pair I can open with and I find no opportunities to steal either so I'm just whittling away.
I'm down to 5800 when I open one off under the gun to 1200 with A-Q. It folds to the chipleader who has probably 38000 to 40000. He announces raise and raises to 3600. I really didn't like my hand and even though I leave myself with only 4600 I chose to fold. He shows the table Q-Q. The very next hand I pick up 99 and I make it 1200 again, super tight old man raises allin for 2025. I don't like it but I have to call the 825 more he shows me A-K and I manage to take it down. I'm then at about 7000 chips. I go on a card drought like no other. I fold through the entire rest of the 200/400 level and besides moving in with some rags in 300/600 I don't pick up a hand. I'm very short at this point and getting semi-desperate. Blinds go up to 400/800 with 100 ante and I am on a new table with lot of big stacks, it finally folds to me and I move in with Q-4 of hearts and everybody folds and I stay alive a little longer. Blinds kick up to 600/1200 and I've only got 5900 chips. It folds to me and I'm UTG+3 and move in with 7c-9c... everybody folds again and I pick 2800 just from blinds and antes. I'm now at 8400 and I feel like I got a shot.

We are now down to 106 players and 52 people will get a seat, so about half the field to go. Roughly 520 people started the tournament. I post my big blind and it folds to this very donkeyish old man who had a mountain of chips after making some ridiculous moves. He annouces raise and tosses in 2400. He then realizes his mistake as he meant to raise 3x the big blind but the dealer says his miniraise has to stand, he didn't know blinds went up from 400/800 to 600/1200. It folds to my big blind and I've got KQ of hearts. I would've folded this to a 3x raise as I'm a strong believer in pushing 9 high rather than calling K high. He liked to raise with ace-rag and even though I'm short I didn't love it. I look at my chips and I see that if I call I have exactly 6000 left and unless I flop open-ended, flushdraw or any pair I'll just lay it down. I decide to make the call as I need to double through and he's the guy to do it on. The flop is Q-9-8. I check, he says I'm all-in... I instantly call. He shows me A-K. Perfect. If I win this I'm up to about 18000 and I've got a super good shot to advance. I just need to dodge an.... burn and turn and there it is, the fat fucking ace of doom. River is a brick and I bust out and I'm sick at my stomach. If he doesn't fuck up and miniraise instead of 3x raise I never play the hand, if that flop doesn't come I don't put another chip in... just all these little things that lead up to such an unfortunate bust. Granted, if I had flopped a king instead of a queen I would've gotten it all in as well and lost. I just got the PERFECT situtation to get a ton of chips and I would've been in great great shape, but I just couldn't get lucky. It was very frustrating as I played for over 8 hours and this was what I believe is the very last live satellite they ran since the main event starts tomorrow.

Frustration and more frustration, it just isn't meant to be and I've now spent close to $5000 trying to qualify for this event with no luck. The one thing I can say though is that I've never played a tournament before where I didn't feel I made a single mistake at any point in the tournament. There's nothing I regret from start to finish and ultimately, I guess that is all I can do. The rest is in the hands of the poker gods.

Fuck the poker gods.

Update on Full Tilt qualifier

So that's that, no WSOP for me. That was the last online satellite that was being ran and I can't afford to play live satellites. It was $1000 entry, got 195 starters and top 16 got a seat into the World Series of Poker with the 17th getting money. I made it down to the last three tables when I go broke on a play I will never let myself forget and I went out in 29th I think? I basically gave away the chance for a seat. I had been short all tournament, and this donkey that was called pdxowl had a HUGE chiplead. He could basically sit out and he would be ensured a seat with 100% accuracy no doubt at all. He started limping a ton of pots, calling raises with garbage and sometimes hitting and sometimes missing. He was mostly hitting.

He limped in mid position, I was shortstacked with A9 and thought I might have the best of it as he had shown down hands like QJ, K10 etc a lot and I move in, he calls with KJ and I double through. I was up to 13k and change with average at 22k and blinds 500/1000 200 ante. I get Q-10 in the big blind and the same guy pdxowl is on my right, everybody folds to him and he miniraises a thousand. I decide to call thinking I'll let my hand go if I don't flop top pair as I might be able to double through him if I just make a pair. He had been giving away chips left and right and was thoroughly bad so that's the only reason I decide to take a flop. The flop is 7-4-2 or something of the sort, he checks and I check. Turn is a Q giving me top pair. He checks again, I decide to bet 4000 leaving myself with about 5900. He miniraises me to 8000 and I'm facing a really tough decision. If I fold I have only five big blinds left after paying the small blind, if I call and win I have a seat for sure, if I call and lose I'm done. I decided to make the call and I was drawing stone cold dead with zero outs as he flopped top set of sevens on the flop. I wish I had never played the hand obviously and I wish I had been playing better and gotten myself a seat as there's nothing more I would want right now than to play the main event. Then at least it wouldn't feel like the Las Vegas trip was a waste in terms of poker (I saw and did a lot of shit but accomplished zero in poker)

On a good note, he had about 70,000 chips and was the chipleader and with about 20 people left he gave away all his chips and he was down to 15,000. Of course being the sore loser that I am I was heavily rooting for him to bust out so he'd miss the seat, he gets his last chips allin preflop AK against QQ and he gets a king on the river because that's just what lucky people does and it looks like he'll get a seat after all. That's a shame. I would've loved to see him bust out as it'd make my day a little better.

All in all, it fucking sucks.

The lack of updates

The reason I haven't updated the blog is because nothing really happened worth writing about lately, nothing positive anyhow. It would just be a long blog of whining about how badly I've been doing and how much I've been losing, and that doesn't make for good reading now does it?

That's why I decided to write one about it anyway, HAH. Jamie left a couple of days ago and that kind of sucked. He got hired for a ... for a .... fuck I can't even say it, its one of those words I really dread. He got hired for a *closes eyes* JOB. There, I said it, phew. He's now working over in indian land and is actually living in the real world with real people and left Vegas. What a quitter. I've just been playing a lot since he left as when he and earlier when both him and Shawn were here I never really played much, we usually did a bunch of other shit, so instead I put in a whole lot of hours. I played a lot of $5/10 no limit at the Bellagio, Caesars Palace and at the Venetian and I lost pretty badly. I've blown about five thousand playing live since he left, all of it in one session too (the last one at the Venetian). Online it's been about the same, putting in a lot of hours but no results. I stepped up to play $10/20 NL online since that's what I've been taking shots at recently and done quite well, since starting to play 10/20 I was up about $13,000 playing 10/20 alone but that little plus statistic got erased quickly as I dropped somewhere around $20k playing in two days. Now that I got that whining off of my chest, we can move on!

I had to return the Cadillac we rented today, me and Jamie went on a road trip up to northern Nevada for a few days right before he left. The normal rental car we rent was only $80 less than renting a sweet ass Cadillac DTS. It had XM radio, the northstar V8 engine and all leather interior. It was the pure nuts. I have never driven in a more comfortable car, I think they retail at around $60,000 so that's what I'm saving up for next! Anyway, I returned the Cadillac today even though I strongly considered keeping it and just hoping I'd fly under their radar un-noticed so I could keep it forever and ever but the good angel on my left shoulder was riding with me that day and he told me to return it or I'd have bad karma. The last thing I need right now is bad karma so I returned the fucker even though I really didn't want to. I couldn't find a taxi to take me home so I waited for about an hour and a half and realized it wasn't coming even though I called them about nine times no exaggeration and they assured me it was on the way so I got on a bus and took the bus back home. Since I'll be stuck grinding it out online trying to rebuild my money and not be able to rent Cadillacs and take week long trips whereever we feel like going for a while it hit me while standing in the bus packed like sardines with a bunch of sweaty people that it was the picture perfect explanation of the lifestyle change from last week to the next couple months.

One day riding a Cadillac, the next public transportation. Gambling for a living is just so much fun, isn't it? Or not. The highs are very high and the lows are pretty fucking low, unfortunately I can't be hired for anything that doesn't pay minimum wage so I'm back to trying to grind it out online, which will be fine. I'll just have to treat it as a job and stop taking shots playing high for a while. A lesson in discipline, indeed, Yoda says.

So that's all for now, Big Chris from Arkansas is coming down on Wednesday and he wanted me to stay an extra night so he can crash in my room and then we'll move to his room on Thursday when he can check in because he's here to play the main event. I've tried satelliting into the main and I just haven't had any luck with it but I'm buying into the Full Tilt $1000 qualifier today and that's probably the last shot I'll take before just realizing I'm not going to get to play it. I've always wanted to play the main event which is why I've tried so many qualifiers but it's just not happening this year from the looks of it. It's just such a juicy tournament... I think it'll fit my style of play very well too as the strongest part of my game is accumulating chips against donkeys. And to do that it's good to have a deep starting stack, which with $10,000 starting chips and 25/50 blinds is exactly what you have. I also got to play one $10k event down in New Orleans for the WSOP Circuit so I know a little bit more what to expect and also realize what mistakes I made down there (played too tight early) and I also want to redeem myself for that poor finish. I ran KK into AA early in the first level down there and lost 90% of my chips immediately and never recovered. If it doesn't happen with this Full Tilt $1k qualifier I guess it's not meant to be, so wish me luck!

Other than that the preliminary plans is to stay with Chris in his room while he's here then rent a car and me and him will drive back, I asked if he'd want to just rent a car instead of him flying back home so I'd get some company and so we can take turns driving and he said he would. That is absolutely awesome since I would hate to make the 26 or so hour drive by myself, also tough to drive it in one stretch when you can't take a nap inbetween.

Online Poker and RadioShack

We went down to buy some new phones at RadioShack today. We've in there before and Sam who works there, checked into what the international calling rates were... last I was there they quoted us that it'd be something like a dollar fifty per minute. That is outrageous so I decided not to get a phone. My pre-pay phone I pay close to the same, and is the main reason I want some kind of plan.

Well, we come back today, and of course we're being our usual crackhead selves driving both Sam and Heather (see we know 'em by first name now, could also be because it's on their tags) crazy most likely. We decide we're not getting a phone after about forty minutes and drive off. We come back not only ten minutes later and stay another hour and fifteen minutesish trying to figure out what to get. Jamie needs one that has built in GPS tracking device and starts playing Beatles "Help" as soon as he gets more than twenty feet away from it. He loses phones so fucking often it is ridiculous, it's always the same thing too... "Man can you believe I lost my phone?" No Jamie, that is completely amazing to me. I never thought you'd lose your phone, I mean really, your track record with them IS FUCKING AWFUL.

He bought another Samsung A900 "Blade" and I bought a Sanyo "Katana" which apparently was new. I like it. Other than that nothing really happened besides poker... been slow, Shawn needs to come back so we can do more crazy things. I also decided I'm going back to San Francisco soon. I didn't get a chance to play at Lucky Chances either last time... gotta do that too.

As far as poker goes. I played some online, put some money on Paradise and won some little bitty tournament that had like 28 people and paid $2000 for first, had the new account there up to about $3500. I decided to try their new $10/20 NL game and sat down with $2000. I ran it up fairly early to right around $6000 and things were going well, then I got involved in a real big pot when I raised under the gun with J-10 of spades (playing 5 handed) to 80, got two callers. Flop came Ks 10d 3s giving me middle pair with a spade-draw. I bet out about $240 in the pot, it goes around to the next person who immediately raised to $700. I decided that he most likely has a king of some sort (KQ-KJ) as I think he'd let me bet the turn if he really flopped a monster. I decided against one pair I'm willing to get it all in considering the fold equity as I've shown preflop and flop strength, so I played my hand very fast and re-raised all-in and he called $3000. The pot was now right above $6000 and as it turns out, he had A-K. I'm 50,5% against 49,5% to win the hand according to cardplayers calculator and I realize how sick these stakes are to me when I essentially flip a coin for six thousand dollars. He won the flip and I'm down to about 3000. I play real aggressively, chip up to about four thousand without a showdown and that's when the game gets short and we're down to three handed. Both of them are terrible players and the one on my immediate right is insanely aggressive which was the end of him in the six and ten handed game but actually worked quite well when it got three handed. We take turns busting on the other guy and after he's broke, I have 4700 and the maniac has about 3200. He makes a real sick call against me playing headup when I check-raise on the flop, bet the turn and fire $600 on the river with J-10 on a Q-8-6-6-7 board and he calls me with Ace-Ten high. It was a real, real sick call and I was shaking my head wondering what was going on. A little while later, he calls my raise on the turn and my bet on the river with K-Q high on the board reading 10-8-2-A-A... once again it was good. He had a keen sense of whenever I was on air to make those big calls but when I made my big two pairs, flushes or straights he'd rarely pay me off. Jamie told me to quit him right then and there but I decided to keep playing.

He finally stacked me when he raised to $80 and I just smooth-call preflop with JJ. Flop is 9-4-3 and he bets 120, I raise to 280, he reraises to 450 and this is where I might have played the hand bad. I just call his bet, fully intending to raise all-in on the turn no matter what hits. The turn is a 5 and he checks (?) this made me wonder what the hell is going on, I still bet $700 and he called. River is a 7 and he instantly moves all-in. The board is 9-7-5-4-3 and it is one scary board. His river bet was about $1560 into a pot that had around 2500 in it. I couldn't figure out a hand that he'd play that way unless it was 6-6 or 4-5. I kept thinking why would he put in the third raise on the flop unless he had a big nine, or something like 9-8 or 10-9. I thought my entire timebank out on this hand before I made the call, and he shows 9-6 for the straight and he stacked me. I think I played the hand really badly, I suppose, but he was so aggressive I was just looking to raise allin on the turn as I was sure he would bet it, perhaps I should've moved in on the flop.

So I went from being 4000 winner to being stuck 3500 which is always fun. I sit down in a new 10/20 NL game this time on PokerStars, and I play very well in my own opinion. Flopped a set and got paid off all-in and had my $2000 buy-in up to $8000 when I decided to quit. Disaster was averted as I still won about $2500 for the day. Which is good considering what could've happened, but is also bad as I could've won close to ten thousand. I'm still getting used to the stakes as I'm not used to playing 10/20 but I feel like I'm playing it well so I'll continue to take shots, just try to not play too shorthanded as the swings get pretty big.

The day after that, I decide to play lower so I multi-table 2/4 NL for several hours. I was playing six tables and I ended up losing badly early, I dropped five buy-ins ($2000) and was tilting pretty hard. I told Jamie to get me some beer and he drove to get some, and I started drinking to calm me down, I know... wise choice huh? I somehow make the miracle comeback and as soon as I had my $2000 back I just shut the computer off and quit right then. One of those days when breaking even (won about $200, close enough) feels like a huge win. I ended up playing 3400 hands that day so got a lot of poker in.

NL $2500 Shorthanded Event

Well, I don't have any good news to report here either. I busted about 3 hrs and 40 minutes into the event, very disappointed. The day never went very well at all and that was quite frustrating.

The buy-in was $2500, all tables were 6-max tables and I drew a really, really good first table. I had Barny Boatman of FTP/Hendon mob fame two to my left and everybody else seemed like they couldn't play a lick so I loved my first table. I won one pot at that table, when I had K-K in the big blind. The blinds were 25/25 and the german guy raised from the cutoff to 100, small blind calls, I raise to 375 and the small blind is the only caller. Flop is 4-3-2 with two diamonds. He checks, I bet 500, he folds 8-8. Good fold on his part.

Right after this, 15 minutes into the tournament I get moved. That sucked. I come to a new table and I see a lot of young internet players like myself, which made me think immediately this is going to be a very aggressive table so I hated my new draw. I recognized the guy in the 3 seat, and I later found out it was "Roothlus" from Pocketfives.com that I used to talk to on MSN a good bit. I forget his real name and I'll just use his internet nick for this report. Anyhow, I get moved there and I have 3000 chips. I very early on raise a pot to 175 with 7-7 and I get three callers. I didn't love that. Flop came 8-8-2 and small blind checks, big blind checks, I need to find out if I have the best hand so I bet 400 into the pot. Big blind check-raises to 1200 and I figure that he might have anything at this point but I wasn't ready to commit all my chips with 7-7 on that flop and so many pre-flop callers that I gave it up.

I get in another hand with Roothlus and the chip leader at the table, I call a raise out of the blind with K-10 of diamonds. Flop came down 10-9-4. I check, Rooth checks, guy bets out 400 and I call and Rooth calls. The fact that Rooth called scared me a bit as I was worried of 10-9, 9-9 and 4-4 along with any draws. Turn come a 9. I decided to play it safe and see what happens and I check, Rooth checks, chipleader guy bets out 1000 I believe. I let my hand go, Rooth checkraises allin and he had flopped a set of fours. The chipleader guy had A-9 and turned trip 9's, Rooth doubles through.

Then I raise A-K a little later, get two callers, I flop queen high and I continuation bet yet again when it gets checked to me and I again get check-raised and I'm forced to let it go. I pick up one or two pots by raising and taking it down after the flop but all in all it was very frustrating as I couldn't get anything to work. The table had been seeing a lot of flops and playing a lot of hands and I pick up aces and queens and both times everybody folds. A little later, I pick up 8-8 and I raise out of the cutoff to 150, small blind calls, Roothlus makes it 450 out of the big blind. I decide to call and small blind calls as well. Flop comes down like 9 9 4 and I check, small blind checks, Roothlus bets 600, I raise allin for 1300 total and Rooth calls the extra 700 and shows A-Q. I dodge an ace and a queen and I double through to about 4200 total.

Then I raise two sevens again, flopped ace high and I get checkraised and forced to let it go. It was very frustrating as I could never really take down anything because I kept having to let go of hands as I couldn't get favorable flops enough to come back over the top and I didn't want to just re-raise hoping they were just pushing me around as I didn't really have enough chips to warrant losing.

Roothlus kicked it up another gear at this point and raised three pots in a row and took them all down, fourth one he opens up under the gun for 150. I look down at A-Q in the small blind. I considered re-raising preflop to 450 or 500 but I was out of position for the hand and he's been so aggressive that I figured if I get a good flop I might be able to get a good bit of chips out of him. I just call and flop comes down Q-10-7. Bingo, I thought. I checked, he bet 400. It was a pretty big bet and I thought I'm good but I didn't want to raise on the flop here as if he has KQ or QJ I might be able to checkraise the turn. I just call. Turn comes a 4, if I remember right. I check, he checks too. River was an inconsequent blank and I decided to valuebet 700. He calls and asks me if I have Q-10, I said no, and I table A-Q. He said "whew" and tables K-K. What the fuck? I was so tired of his aggressive pre-flop raising over and over that he could've stacked me on this hand if he played his hand faster so I was fairly happy I still had 1900 after this, could've been a lot worse.

We go on a break and I come back at 50/100. I blind down to 1650 when Roothlus again opens under the gun, as he raised a plenty, it folds to me in the small blind I have KQ of spades and I push all-in and he folds. A little later, I open with K-10 from the cutoff and get two callers, flop K-Q-2... they check to me I bet 500 they both fold. I also raise another pot, whiffed it but took it down with a continuationbet so I was back up to 3800. That's when it started going badly again. I call a preflop raise of 450 from a tight player with 7-7. Flop K-K-2. I check he bets 800 which was a huge bet, I decided here too that I don't want to gamble as the only thing I beat realistically is A-Q so I let it go. I then open under the gun for 300 with 5-5. Guy on my left who is quite horrible and weak calls, big blind thinks for a while and calls. Flop A-K-2 with two clubs. Big blind checks, I bet 500, guy on my left folded and I was thinking I'll take it down until the big blind throws out 2000 and I'm yet again forced to fold. I was really getting frustrated by the fact that I couldn't get anything to work, I tried to keep up the same pace of bets and raises and as soon as I flop a hand I was thinking I'm getting paid because of the constant raising, I just seemed to fail to pick up a hand.

On the bustout hand I've blinded down all the way to 1250, Rooth limps in under the gun, blinds are about to be 100/200 and I'm short on chips. I complete from the small blind with 10-7 of clubs, big blind taps the table. Flop is 7-5-3 with two hearts. I check, big blind bets 200, Rooth smooth-calls, I decide I'll take my stand here and put in my 1200. BB folds, Rooth insta-calls and he flopped yet another set. He ran absurdly good at the table and he was for sure my nemesis today. Flopped two sets against top pair twice against me and had KK when I hit TPTK with A-Q. I just couldn't beat him. I asked him after I busted if it was him from Pocketfives and he confirmed and he said he was sorry he busted me, I said it's no big deal and wished him luck. I really hope he'll do well and put my chips to good use.

All in all quite disappointing, just never really felt I got in a good groove and once the blinds went up I got so short. I'll see if I'll play the $2000 No Limit Hold'em tomorrow, if not I might just play some cashgames and some online.

It's hard out here for a golf hustla

Carmel

I can tell you I didn't think I'd be calling Vegas home about three years ago when I was back in Sweden, but I guess it is now. On the way back from San Francisco we decided to take the Pacific Coast Highway because they said it's very nice visually and I hadn't seen it so we drove down it. We drove about three and a half hours south past Santa Cruz and San Jose and whatever else is down there. That's when we realized we had to make a stop up in northern Nevada anyway, and going all the way down to L.A. then to Vegas then up to northern Nevada. That would've actually been a longer trip by several hours than turning around, so being the smart planners we are, we turned right the fuck around and headed back to San Francisco. I took a little nap somewhere around here but I think we drove back through Sacramento. If memory recalls, the next stop we made was in Carmel. That place is also host to Pebble Beach golf course and a bunch of other just absolutely awesome places, we were going to go play a round of golf at Pebble Beach but since they would charge us about $60,000, our rental car, our right leg and give up your kid so we decided it was a little too expensive for us. We were fine with the car, the money and the leg but Jamie just didn't want to give up little Jayci West because it's his little pumpkinhead and he wouldn't give her up. I tried convincing him that Pebble Beach is an awesome course and there's always new kids to adopt but he wouldn't budge. Bummer. We drove around and took some pictures of the place, and then left for Tahoe.

Pacific Coast Highway stop

We made it to Tahoe at around midnight, decided we can't go any further since we'd been driving about 14 hours so we just got a hotel there and went right to sleep.

Our room at Tahoe

The following day we got up fairly early and we went to check out the casinos around there but they had nothing in terms of poker so we just decided to go play golf. Now this is where it started getting interesting.

So being the true gamblers that we are, we decided we're going to make some bets. The deal was $10 per person, per hole to the winner of the hole. It was a 9 hole course so a sweep would net you $90+90 - $180, plus a small $20 bonus to whoever won the total score. No one had an idea how anybody else played but we figured it'd be fun. Jamie was pulling some practice swings and it looked pretty good and he said his grandfather owns a golfshop and he started taking lessons when he was four or something. Is it too late to reneg the bet was what went through my mind, but alas, it was. We teed off on the first one and I think all of us sucked. My swing was horrible, they had no driving range to practice on so I was plenty rusty, not that I ever really could play. I've gone maybe three rounds in my life together with my brother and never shot anything worth bragging about so I knew I'd suck. The first three holes all went to shit for me, Shawn was surprising though. He had a tendency to shoot balls that went about one foot in the air slicking the ground but going far and perfectly straight. Mine and Jamies shots after a while went up in the air but after that they got their own fucking will and went right or left depending on their mood, very rarely were they in the mood to go perfectly straight. I also putt about as well as a blind man crippled with no arms so I had that working against me. If they just took the putting, chipping, pitching and basically anything that doesn't involve me hitting the ball with any type of touch or feel I'd be a superb fucking golfer. After the first nine and the dust settled, Shawn shot a 46, Jamie shot a 60 after being all over the place and I shot a 52. Shawn slaughtered us, he won about $80 total on it though as he didn't win all the holes and shit.

Jamie in action

The next round, we decided to up the ante since we all knew how we played. We somehow got Shawn to spot us half a stroke a hole counting ONLY towards the end total. Then we played for $40 a piece per hole, so $80 per hole. The total you could win now by sweeping was 9x8 = $560 plus an added $150 bonus, $75 per person for having the best total score at the end. I was now swinging much better too and felt confident as I had already counted Jamie out as he couldn't hit a ball straight to save his life in the first round and was just worried about Shawn but I figured he'd choke and I'd make some easy money.

First tee-off Jamie hits it like 230 yds perfectly straight onto the fairway. Wow... would you have thunk it? His swing changed, his stance changed and he actually hits them good now. Am I being hustled by my best fucking buddy? It cannot be, he wouldn't do shit like that. I still hit pretty good and birdied like the 4th hole and I was playing a ton better than the round before. My tee-shots and my chips and pitches were all going very well I just still couldn't putt. Shawn was playing solid still although the first five holes he was all over the place but the last four he played perfect. Jamie had the game of his life as all of a sudden he couldn't miss... WHAT A FUCKING COINCIDENCE since the stakes had been raised huh?

If it wasn't for the skin-color I know you'd think that's Tiger. Man, I look good.

It comes down to the very last hole and me and Jamie are dead even in amount of holes won, the very last hole is played as a carry-over from the last one though so $160 is riding on it plus the total score. I was two strokes ahead of Jamie and five ahead of Shawn for the very last hole. It was like 170 yards if mind serves me right and I tee'd off perfect hitting it straight and landed about 30 feet from the green. I figured I was good as gold now to win it. Jamie hit his absolutely perfectly landing maybe 50 feet away from the pin right on the fucking green, Shawn hits his as well and lands RIGHT NEXT TO JAMIE. I was like motherfucker the tee-shot of my life and I'm in third. I should've picked one club longer, damnit. We go over there and they're teasing me about choking and that I'll fuck this up and this and that. They didn't know that you could probably think I was half-russian and half-serbian considering how incredibly icy cool I am under pressure. I go to chip in with the calmness and confidence of a steroid-induced Barry Bonds when I chip it ALL THE WAY over the flag and onto the other side of the green. I heard them coughing something about "choke" when I was walking with my tail between my legs to the ball. I get it up on green and Jamie sinks his second putt for par and I have two putts to sink it for a win, three for a tie. I miss my first putt, I miss my second one and on the third putt it's literally like 15 inches and I nonchalantly walk up to tap it in and it swirls around the cup and I miss and Jamie starts yelling "YES!" and this is about the time I picked up my club and smashed it right in his fucking forehead. I actually never did but I wanted to for a split-second as I admitted defeat and tapped out at 1hr and 45 min in round 2, hole 9. We paid the man his money and left shrugging our shoulders wondering how in the fuck he stepped up his game so much for round two. Mental note, don't ever gamble for money with Jamie until you've played with him a few times no matter what it is, motherfucker would hustle his own grandmother!

Tahoe

Then we drove home and I was so tired in the car, it was like 6 in the morning when I manage to do 95 on a 70 highway and there's like no cars in sight for miles and miles ahead. Except one, infront of us... wow... we're getting closer, it's black. It has a lot of antennas. It also has sirens on top. Looks awfully familar, I can't quite place what it might be.... OH MY GOD IT'S A COP. He pulls to the side infront of us, Jamie says "He got you bud..." and as I pass him he turns on the lights and pulls me over. I'm a retard. He reduced it to 85mph past but he clocked me at 95mph from a thousand feet. He was a very cool guy and I showed him my swedish license and he asked me a bunch about how I liked it here and was really quite nice, gave me a $200 ticket and told me to be careful on the way back. That sucked.

I passed out forever then woke up today, played some online. Decided to try some more $10/20 NL online as I've been trying to put in more sessions there and I won about $2800. I then played a very small $200 tournament on Paradise called Laguna, it had like 30 people and top 4 got paid. I played ultra-loose, super aggressive more-so than my usual self and managed to win it for $2000. So all in all, I had a pretty good day, except they were being pains in my ass when I tried to re-rent my car with Alamo but in the end it worked out. I need to just buy a decent car, this renting at $550 a week isn't cutting it. If anyone knows of a decent car in the Vegas area, with air conditioning and just in decent shape let me know.

San Francisco (pics updated)

So where do I begin? We were sitting around in the apartment in Vegas and we were semi-bored. I was reading something online and just blurted out “Why don’t we go to San Diego, or San Francisco”. Jamie said, in his normal manner, “well come on then motherfucker lets go”

It took me a minute to realize he was serious, then I started packing my shit and we informed Shawn of the new plans, to drive to San Francisco. We started driving at like 6 in the morning and drove up through Beatty and Tonopah to Yosemite National Park. That place was absolutely awesome, reminded me a lot of Sweden actually.

Yosemite

More Yosemite

We stop at about every 25 feet to take a picture so we moved at a snail-like pace. We also stopped somewhere to take pictures in the snow, Jamie and Shawn went a little higher up on the hill and I was about to take a picture of them when I see a snowball being thrown at me through the camera-lens. I ducked with spiderman-like flexibility when all of a sudden my feet disappeared from under me as it was pretty fucking icy. I slipped and I caught myself and was pretty proud of the fact that I didn’t fall, until about five seconds later I did a full 360 spin and fell right in the snow. A family of three were right next to us videoing their kid and he turned around to video me as I slammed head first into the snow. I think I might make a guest-appearance on Americas funniest homevideos at some point soon.

Their big ass grins are because I fell literally five seconds before this.

Then we make it into California and onto San Francisco, which is a very cool place. We came in over the Bay Bridge and drove right in to find a hotel somewhere, we found a decent one at the Lombard/Octavia intersection called Marina Inn and we got us a room.

Our hotel, Marina Inn

The very first night, was the night of 4^th of July so we took a walk out to see the fireworks in the Bay. We walked down to Fisherman’s Wharf and made it just in time to watch the fireworks and shit, it was absolutely packed there. It was pretty late by the time that was over, so we went to get some rest after having been in the car all day and waited until next day to start doing some stuff.

Fisherman's Wharf

We got up way too early, at around 8 am, and I can count on one hand the times I’ve gotten up at 8 am in the last year, we went down to take the Duck Tour when you ride around on an amphibious duck and it makes for a quacking time. They gave us these little whistles that makes duck sounds when you blow in them, and as Shawn has a tendency to like things he can blow he got right on that and every now and then you’ll randomly hear him quacking at people on the street, or wake up our neighbors with quacking noises or just being randomly fucking obnoxiously annoying. Shawn has also been walking around talking with a lisp ever since we got here, that’s pretty brutal to have to wake up to him making quacking noises and then starting to say something like “snookums baby are you alright?” He needs to be locked up, I think. The quack-mobile set sail out to go around the bay for half an hour or so and we rode around the city for another forty-five minutes, I’d guess. After this, Jamie felt the calling and we had to go to Castro. The big rainbow flag greeted him home, and I am not making this up, he gets out of the taxi and he throws his arms wide open and yelled “Viva la Castro, niggas, I’m home!”

Jamie is home

I’m pretty sure that’s what he said anyway, my memory is a little fuzzy as this was a couple days ago but I think that’s as accurate as can be. We walked around there for a while and then took a cab back to eat dinner. We found some extremely cheap and non-touristy place that cost about $200 for dinner and where lemonade was like $5 per glass, it was brutal. Shawn is on his diet now so he had to drink their expensive ass lemonade and couldn’t have any dessert. As you guys know by now, me and Jamie are both very supportive friends and we like to make it as easy as possible for him so when he waiter asked if we wanted dessert, of course you know what we said. HELL FUCKING YES WE WANT DESSERT, just because fatboy can’t have any doesn’t mean we can’t. Key Lime Pie for him and Crème Brule for me, the look on Shawns face when he was staring at us eating was heartbreaking, if it wasn’t for that it was so incredibly good I would’ve felt a little bit of sympathy for the poor guy.

Proverb poster will be out in stores late August

The next day, we decided to get even more adventurous and we rented bikes to bike the Golden Gate. Yeah, that idea sounded just as good to us as what you’re thinking. All three of us have a pretty hard time moving ourselves around the apartment much less biking for 9 miles. It was brutal. I actually thought it’d be even worse than it was, but I personally felt somewhat fine most of the time, Jamie took a lot of stops to take “pictures”. An awful lot of picture stops, actually, more than his camera phone most likely can hold. Shawn on the other hand was a trooper, he was pedalling away like a motherfucker. On flat ground and uphill he had a lot of trouble, but he was really good at the downhill parts. He had those down pat. He was also excellent at the rest-stops, that might’ve been his shining moment of the entire bike ride. Then we went home by ferry because there’s no way we were pedalling back. All of us got pretty badly sunburnt on this little trip, to the extent that both me and Jamie look like Rudolph with glowing red noses and my face, arms and hands just hurt so fucking badly that it feels like I’ve been set on fire. It hurts.

Brave bikers about a third of the way of the eight mile trip. We're still standing.

Then we went to another restaurant. After we get done with the meal, Shawn looks at me with a completely serious face as he was looking at the finely shredded cheese laying in a bowl next to his plate. He goes, “How much if I snort a line of cheese?” I started laughing, then I remember that he’s actually broke and he was serious, I said I’d give him a hundred… he lined up the line of cheese and Jamie said “you fucking crackheads I’m out of here” and he left. Shawn couldn’t quite find something to snort it with and considering we were in a four-star restaurant he did give the idea up, too bad. After this we went to drink, and I love Guinness so I ordered one for me and Shawn both. The faces he made when he drank that which he called liquid death was priceless. I asked if he wanted another one and he said that he’d honest to god rather drink urine… somehow it wasn’t his cup of piss, or however the saying goes. San Francisco has been a lot of fun and definitely one of the best trips I’ve been on, we’ve done so many things when we’ve been here too that we’ve been up from early morning to late night with very little downtime just laying around. Me and Shawn went driving down Lombard yesterday too and after he got done driving the crooked part we had to do it all over again so I could drive it, we’re retarded like that.

Curvy, curvy road

He'll be bouncing down the mountain when he comes

Yesterday they told us that we can't extend our weekly two bedroom thing and they said they only have one bedrooms. We had to go and move our shit between the two rooms in 110 degree heat and it was a pain in the ass. Shawn, of course, brought all his stuff from his apartment into the weekly-rental and we had to move all that too. Well, he had to move it, but it was tiring as shit to watch him too. I had no idea I had bought so much shit since we came on this trip either, was a solid seven trips between the two apartments to move the things. I went right asleep as we came to the new place and slept for 15 hours straight. Before we moved, we had gotten through playing a long session at the Rio and then at the Bellagio so I was tired already before moving. I played some satellites and played some in an awesome 5/10 game at the Bellagio.

Me and Jamie also played in a 2/5 at the Rio and this one guy was so fucking funny it was ridiculous, I was laughing until I was tearing up constantly when he kept his little witty comments going. Another grungy looking guy that was in his early 20's was sitting in one seat, and this guy, in his mid to late thirties who was so funny kept jabbing at him over and over. Jamie asked him where he was from and he said, this little place called Washington D.C. It's close to Maryland... we make laws and things there.

He said he lived close to a trail where the president would ride his bike and every time he rode the bike they closed the neighborhood down. It pissed him off he said as for three hours he couldn't leave his house. He said it was bullshit because the guy was actually riding three miles up the road. He was just constantly making fun of this grungy guy because he was friends with a really cute girl who was also at the table, he kept telling him he'd give him $10 if he wanted to go play videogames while he took the girl to lunch. Anyway, after all that, we go and play the Bellagio for a few hours then take off to move our shit.

When all of us woke up, it was something like 6:30 in the morning. We left the house at 7 AM and they were going to drop me off at the Bellagio and I was going to play for a few hours before the online Sunday tournaments started. While we were riding, Shawn said, there's so many things we gotta do. We need to go to Mt Charleston, play golf, go to the Grand Canyon etc. I said, well lets go to Mt Charleston then. Well motherfucker, lets go, Jamie said and turned the car around. We changed to shorts instead of jeans and took off to Mt Charleston. It felt really good outside and riding with the windows down, blasting music and just bullshitting was quite relaxing. We make it up to Mt Charleston, which was absolutely gorgeous. The scenery changed from desert to forest quite quickly. We make it to one of the outposts and turn around to go to the next place which was higher up, at about 8000 feet. Half-way on the way up the road, we see a cave a bit up the mountain. For some reason, we pulled over at the side of the road and decided we're climbing it. Now, we aren't all exactly in perfect shape but I'm sure that if the circumstances required it we'd be able to run to the fridge and back to get a beer in a decent time. We start going up the side of the road and it starts off being like 20 feet of a pretty steep slope. Me and Jamie made it up there first and Jamie was already out of breath, we only had like two miles left to go. As good friends we stand up top and make fun of Shawn as he makes his way up there.

We take off walking and we make it like a hundred feet before we decide we're not gonna make it. It was pretty far. Shawn also got badly injured on the way up as is seen below. It is hard for any hiker to continue after being in a near death experience like that.




I'm also not a fan of bugs, spiders or snakes in any way and of course these faggots start fucking with me, throwing little rocks into the bushes next to me making me jump about six feet high every god damn time. It wasn't funny at all, we make it down the road and Jamie goes first down the steep slope right before the car. He slid down real fast by sitting down on one foot and balancing himself with the other foot infront of him. I slid down after him standing straight up just sliding on my shoes, which made it awfully close for me to face-plant right in the pavement. Shawn is last to go and he starts sliding down with his back towards the road and Jamie yells at him you're going to hurt yourself going like that, you're going to fall. Shawn turns around and I decide this might be a kodak moment. My spider-senses were right, as here he comes. If you picture a wrecking ball. Now picture it being hurled from the moon and towards the earth and try to imagine the speed and velocity of this thing. Now replace the wrecking-ball with Shawn and you are getting what I'm picturing. I get the video camera recording and you hear it loudly on the video as Jamie says "You're going to hurt yourself" and then I say "There he goes" and then wham, bam, bang and he's face first into the fucking pavement. He even put his hand out towards Jamie, thinking he was going to be saved as Jamie side-stepped aside watching him bounce down facefirst into the road. I made sure I (one) had him in the frame the entire way from top of the little cliff until he was down in the pavement, (two) set the camera off recording, (three) took a couple still-frame pictures and then (four) went up and asked him if he was okay. (Did you notice the order of priority?)

He slammed right on his $700 pocket pc phone when he fell down and he broke the phone. We get back in the car and it's like a little silence for a good five minutes as we ride, no one is saying a word. Jamie breaks the silence by saying, "You can have my phone if you want..." and then a little while later, "that was pretty fucking funny you have to admit", he just kept telling us to shut up, fuck you. Then he kept saying "give me my camera, give me my god damn camera, give me my camera"... I said we can't do it, it can't happen until I copy the pics and video. He skinned his legs and arms pretty good and he's gonna have some serious bruises. As I am writing this, I hear him in the bathtub "Ahhhhhhh, owwwww, FUCK" and he can barely move. It is absolutely hilarious. We go up to some other trail and he's still pissed so he was staying in the car, me and Jamie go out to take some pictures. About five minutes later, we go back to the car and the car is gone. We're 7000 feet up on a mountain and he fucking left. Jamie said, "you have your phone?" and I said "Yep, in the car.." then Jamie goes, "I hope he comes back..."

Shawn waited a few minutes then came back, thankfully. We go up to some viewing point, take a few pictures and then turned around. I was laughing so hard in the car the entire way. I was looking into buying a phone in a RadioShack and Jamie needed to pay his bill, so we stopped there. Shawn goes up to the clerk and said, man I fell and busted my phone and asked him how much it would be to replace it. Jamie says, "Yeah man he fell off this cliff and he busted his ass on the concrete", the clerk said he'd LOVE to see that. I said, don't worry, we have it on camera! I of course run out to the car, while Shawn is screaming DON'T YOU FUCKING SHOW HIM THAT and I bring it back and show it to the clerk who of course starts laughing his ass off too. It was so funny.

I am gonna post a few pictures underneath of our little trip.

Our goal, the cave.

Shawn on his way down, looking good!

Soldier down, and in pain.

A good friend lending a helping hand, after getting done laughing.

The face (or rear) of defeat.

Did he just fucking leave us for real?

The donks conquered the mountain, bloody,

battered, but spirits high.





VIDEO EXCLUSIVE, CLICK ON IT AND LET IT LOAD. WARNING, FUNNY SHIT.